Friday, November 4, 2016

The New Player Experience Playthough

Well appear to be getting on top of real life at the minute (after a few months of really not) so back to Eve and I hear the New Player Experience is on SiSi. Lets go and see. Obviously spoilers if you are planning to do the NPE story-line yourself.

Quickly clear a slot and make a Caldari toon (Looks like they reduced biomass countdown from 10 hours to 10 minutes on SiSi). Lets do this!

OK in space and in an Ibis. Not that new so far. Wait. Who the smeg is Fleet Commander Kaatara.

Training restrictions? Oh here's Aura. Wait, am in a bubble in a 1.0 system? Drifters? Will new players be thinking Borg V2 like I am or "space hobos". Could do with a quick explanation what Drifters are?

Ooooo! Wrecked Titan. Sounds like my fleet got kerb-stomped!

Not graduated from flight school? Find survivors? OK I can do that.

Showing camera control using right-click. Navigation using right-click and then onto radial menu. Good stuff for new bros

New tips are good showing visuals where to go. Helpful!

Sisters of Eve research team? Good voice acting here. What.... Drifters are coming back here? I'M IN A IBIS AND IN A BUBBLE! OK, kill bubble generator... wait... Seeker! Kill it! Another seeker! Kill it! A second bubble? FFS. What did you say? A SQUADRON OF DRIFTER BS HEADING MY WAY!

"The cluster is shutting down"


OK Back on. Kill backup bubble now. Easy! 30km in an Ibis! Oh well that was easy to kill and.... oh....


OK so I need to build a data analyser? Really? What are you talking about. There are hundreds only 3 jumps away and 50k. You just gave me 250k for doing that first bit. OK so we'll look at that in a moment will we. First skills. What? New character sheet. Oh, this is what some were QQ'ing about. Mmmmmm first up "Give CCP MOAR MONEY!"

Yeah, I have 259,000 ISK and this is advising me to spend a billion. Righto!

Erm.... yeah... not sure I like this. Might be the Bitter Vet in me but.... wut?

Why is it not in alphabetical order? Where the feck are shields????

Oh there. Personally, do not like! Its going to take time to get used to where everything is now positioned.

Start! Oh yeah, my main is already training. Oh shock. More adverts pop up for "Give CCP MOAR MONEY!". I know CCP is a business but isn't all this "Pay more" pop ups going to put some off? Get them hooker first? I suppose a brand new toon will not have another one on same account so this one won't be an issue in truth.

So free skill book and tutorial on how to train skills and free armour repper (for an Ibis! Real shield tanked ships armour tank? What are we teaching new bros here?). Anyway we need to kill some pirates to to make some money to buy the stuff I need to build a data analyser for a critical mission for the State who already gave me 250k ISK were they are for sale locally. Oh well, lets engage the "willing suspension of disbelief and move on."

"Warp drive... active!" What was that??? Some Talkie Toaster-esq AI speak.

Need to take out the pirates but gas cloud in way. Aura telling me about going through and using AB and repper. Erm... why not just fly around it?

Getting the feeling this NPE will be OK for who its designed for but vets will have a lot of WTF moments.

"Look! Approach! Orbit! Shoot!" Thanks for that baldy!

Three waves of Kestrels. 60% shields so didn't need that repper although I was sensible and flew around the "DEADLY CLOUD OF DEATH!" that Aura thought would be a good idea just to fly through,

Oh I get a crate with just enough minerals to make a data analyser.

"Warp drive.... Active!" - Yeah I don't like that new voice!

"Dockingpermisionrequested" - Or that one!

Industrial tutorial. Seriously? 20k for a civvy BPO. They are for sale close to here! Oh well whatever.

Recon mission briefing whilst that job runs.

SoE woman - "There are few people I trust these days..." however I, someone you've just met is one of them. You need to get out more love! Wow, all that talk was just long enough for that job to run! Undock!

"Autopilot engaged." Nope, do not like.

"Warp drive.... Active!" - STOP SAYING IT LIKE THAT!

"Approaching.... STARGATE!" Stop in please!

Hack a data analyser. Pretty lights. Run away. OK.

Safe spot! Would be better to explain what that means. Oh.... Drifters hijacked a capital? I need to web it? Are you serious? You want me to go and take on a Drifter capital with a webbing Ibis? Right....

Next job warp to forward operating base. They are really shoe-horning those phases into this :)

Ohhhh a fleet at a Citadel.

Good explanation that we can build these and an opportunity to fly around the fleet and look at some caps and battleships. Ooooo I get a new ship. Well wouldn't want to go up against a Drifter controlled capital ship in an Ibis,.. so I get a... Merlin -.-

Also give a 80k "mini-skill injector" to allow you to jump to frigate IV.

So time for the big battle! Multiple jumps to get there.. Multiple "Warp drive.... ACTIVE!" annoyance. I really hate it! Please bring back the old one. Please!

Oooooo massive Drifter gate.

Inside its.... a cluster fuck! I'm in charge of Circadian Seeker murder! Erm.... bug. I just webbed a seeker and the tutorial said I completed webbing the capital ship. What capital ship? Erm... I see no capital ship! Oh... there it is!

Right, Seekers all toast time for me to be the hero... and web a FAX! Will shoot it too with my triple civilian gatling guns. PEW PEW PEW -.-

More Seekers turn up and pick on me! East to kill and back to the FAX that is being hammered by the Caldari fleet.


Pew Pew Pew! Next job? Kill the hive.

More Seekers picking on me. Kill them and then time to kill the Hive. What? When it explodes its going to be a big bang? Okaaaaay..... so you're pulling the fleet back away? Except me? I have to stay and die for the State? Wut???


So back I'm station in a new clone!

New ship, new modules. Done that and we now replay Fleet Commander Kaatara's speech about you're staying back to kill the Drifter hive that I heard 2 minutes ago??? Another bug! Erm.... now what? I cannot kill it again?

Well without a Hive to kill how can I finish "Death is just the beginning". Right.... its all gone... 

Disappointing end (as in its stuck so I didn't see the end) but I guess it is still WiP?


  1. I had similar problems with the new NPE. The Mineral Container didn't Show up after killing all Drifters and I couldn't build the data analyser with the BPC. It fells like this is in an early beta state and not one week before the release.

  2. Apparently you can screw up the tutorial just letting the first Drifter Battleships kill you. BTW, did you notice that neither the Sleepers nor the Drifters nor the bubble generators are visible at the default Overview settings? You're seeing them because you're using your vet client and have them tagged visible... but noobs will start with a fresh install and they are not tagged visible by default.

    Enjoy CCP quality.

  3. Oh... you'll like the end: "Thanks for your work, you are now a free capsuler, to replace your Merlin take this Venture and the skillbook needed to fly it.".
    And as players have learned to follow commands of their fleet commander they will start mining... :/

  4. Oh have they made explosions cause damage now then? That's pretty cool!