Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Eve is Nobody's Bitch

I didn't have a good day on Tuesday in Black Rise, actually it was a pretty bad day. OK, so on Tuesday a lot more people had really bad day over in null sec. But what do you expect when you are sat in your 100bn ISK ship (or 222bn) in the middle of this!

I've been there, done that, had the lag. Sat in my ship with soul crushing lag watching my guns take three weeks to cycle wondering when I'll be primaried. Jump, lock, F1, lock, F1, lock, F1, die. I'm glad I've tried null-sec sov wars and been a part of battles involving titans and super carriers, but yeah, not what I find fun in Eve.

On Tuesday, OK I didn't loose a Titan, but I did loose a few ships. At Tuesday lunchtime I had 14 loses in January. By the time I logged it was 19.

The day before, Monday, had been a rather good day. Lots to shoot, and I was killin' like it was going out of business:-

First a neutral Cyclone engaged my Thrasher on a gate so I jumped as he yellow boxed me, burnt home, grabbed a Hurricane and went back and found him in a belt. Killed him nicely! Next up was a squid Corax I probed down. BANG! And podded! Next a Slicer came at my Kestrel. BOOM! Dead Slicer! Retribution running a plex? My Enyo powered through his tank. SPLAT! Atron? My Kestrel made short work of him. KAPOW! Finally there was a Hookbill so I took my Hookbill against him. Was a VERY close fight, but I popped as he was in low structure. As an act of supreme derpness I tried to overheat my rocket launchers again towards the end of the fight... but actually turned them off. Doh! But gf anyway! FIZZLE!

In all, six kills for one loss on Monday. I was like...

Then Tuesday comes.... and Eve beats its chest and yells "I AM NOBODYS BITCH!" and royally screws me over!

I'm flying about in my Kestrel and spot a Hawk in a plex. There are others in there so I decide to take a look. I enter and he's right on the warp-in. I try to burn out, but he catches me. There are others there pointing him so I reship and get my Enyo. That'll kill him! WTF? He's tanking me easy plus the other two? What is going on? He kills me and escapes. The guy who was still pointing him lost point when I came back. I looked at his older loses and see he runs a TRIPLE ASB Hawk! I grab another Kestrel and go roaming. A Fed Navy Comet on steroids catches me covering 40km in a blink of an eye. Arse! I grab a 10mn Thrasher and find an Incursus only to find its a bait tank and his mate in a Firetail is at a pounce. FFS! Another Kestrel for me another Slicer target, close fight with him in structure but he wins.

Five losses. No kills.

So even when you think you are having a good run, Eve Online can still slap you in the face, knee you in the nads and then point and laugh at you as you roll around the floor in agony. There is nothing you can do. Its the way of the world... or the way of space. You have to accept in Eve Online some days you are the pigeon, other days you are the statue.

The silver lining to this post? A bunch of the 'Cats killed one of those Slicers after I logged so at least my KB shows one kill for all those loses. 5-1 against, but at least one of those bar stewards died!

*The title of this blog is actually an old Tweet from fellow "security status challenged" capsuleer Rixx Javix. It was in response to Sinclar Ferguson who Tweeted that he loved it that Eve Online "....looks at you and says I'm bigger than you.". I've had that Tweet stored for a long time waiting for an oppertunity to use it! Since 30/12/2012 actually!


  1. I've been playing games since PONG and in every game there comes a moment when you break thru to the other side, sometimes it happens almost immediately and sometimes it takes some time - but it always happens. As much as we strive for that moment, when it finally arrives the game is essentially finished. We may still play it for fun or nostalgia, but the initial challenge can never be replaced.

    Eve however. I've been playing it for over five years now and I feel I am no closer to that moment. In fact, one days like you had, it feels like we are going in the opposite direction.

    That is the true glory of Eve. She is a bitch and she has no fucks to give.

  2. Now now Drack you don't give full credit to supers in those fights. It's: Jump, Lock, Rep blue thing, Launch fighterbombers, Attack things with fighterbombers, lock new thing to rep, realise you have your fighterbombers on friendly and reps on enemy and switch them, laugh at the first dreads that shoot you, overheat for the next few, ask for reps when there are more, laugh when you get armor back, etc....