Monday, December 30, 2013

Best Tears of 2013

Eve has 'meaningful' PvP. When you die you lose everything that was fitted to your ship. If you are in a fleet and your side holds the field you might be able to salvage a few bits and pieces that didn't get destroyed, but if you are solo or the enemy fleet held the field, its likely they have looted your wreck. This makes PvP intense and exciting. It also makes for some amazing tears.

Another thing is that we get a lot of farmers up our way. People who have SIGNED UP FOR FACTION WAR but don't want to fight and get very emotional when you pop them, especially when you catch one of their triple-stabbed, trash fit, t1 frigates. "I didn't ask for PvP!" they blub.... and then get a bit more aggressive when you point out that they did by signing up for faction WAR.

Both of these combined make for some interesting local 'chats' post-fight. I try to be nice in-game. If I kill someone I give a 'gf' even if it wasn't (i.e. my arty Thrasher alpha'd them before they could say "wtf...."). It goes both ways and if I walk into a trap and the 'solo fight' I thought I was getting turns into a 'Drackarn Gang-Bang', I'll still "gf". However, many others like to be more..... expressive... in local.

Luckily we have a thread on our forums for posting the best tears.... because sharing is caring. Here are some of my favourites from 2013 (with the crying party's names shortened to their first letter). These are all either directed at me (when my name is mentioned) or to a fellow Quantum Cats Syndicate pilot.

WARNING - Naughty words are used by some of the 'victims'.

Sometimes it is short:-

[08:33:05] Drackarn > gf
[08:33:09] Deryn Angrard > gf
[08:33:14] C > diaf

Sometimes it is very short:-

[19:07:21] Drackarn > gf
[19:08:13] J > faggot

Sometimes they like to make their point a few times just in case you missed the homophobic slur the first time as a corpie found out here:-

[19:30:31] T > fag
[19:30:33] chatgris > gf
[19:30:48] T > FAG
[19:31:30] T > double fag (Dracks note - I love the 42 second delay here, he must have been thinking hard for his next insult)

This next one was because I was chasing a squid farmer around Hirri, he wouldn't fight and simply warped off when I got point, multiple stabs! Second squid came in I thought I'd 1v2 them, my Incursus verses their Merlin and Incursus. Nope, they both ran, both were multi-stabbed. So..... time for the Amarrian alt in the twin scram Breacher. I killed the Merlin first and then the Incurus second. The Incursus pilot was was OK about it, gave in local a "gf" and convo'd my alt to ask why the purple-on-purple? As we chat with me explaining why (use stabs in Faction War and I'll use underhand tactics to catch you), local is scrolling... in Russian. Please forgive the Google Translate and I removed my alts name too. Also remember this guy just lost a T1 trash-fit Merlin...

[05:36:04] R > XXXXXXXXXX
[05:37:57] R > I own (Dracks note - I assume this was aimed at my alt and is supposed to be "This is my plex, please go away and find your own")
[05:38:07] R > no
[05:38:23] R > no
[05:38:45] R > no
[05:39:35] R > XXXXXXXXXX deductible fucking cancer
[05:39:56] Drackarn> Don't fit stabs
[05:40:01] R > nit
[05:40:24] R > XXXXXXXXXX sucker for what?
[05:40:59] R > XXXXXXXXXX answer goof
[05:41:22] R > Drackarn asshole
[05:41:31] R > fagot

This one here defies belief really. We are playing a computer game about internet spaceships.....

[12:03:12] Tzenick > gf
[12:03:17] N > OMFG
[12:03:48] N > It's the damnation in system.
[12:04:22] N > No gf.
[12:04:33] Tzenick > ok
[12:04:40] N > None
[12:04:44] Tzenick > rgr
[12:04:50] Tzenick > Have a nice day
[12:04:53] N > I hope you kill your family in a car accident and survive.
[12:05:01] Tzenick > Really.
[12:05:02] Mehashi 'Kho > lmfao
[12:05:02] Mezo Rage > Nasty stuff

Mr P below believes in 1v1's. The fact that he likes to use faction frigates against normal T1 frigates is not the point. Seriously! A faction frigate verses a T1 frigate is a fair 1v1 fight in his eyes! So when he attacks one of our deplexing toons in our home system (he never asked for a 1v1, just thought he could get a quick gank) and two more come to the rescue (me and another 'Cat)..... well that is just unfair! I think I may have had a drink with this one... I tend to answer back a bit when I'm merry!

[07:36:01 ] Drackarn > gf
[07:36:19 ] P > garbage fight not one piece of shit in this game can 1v1 your garbage
[07:36:28 ] P > circle jerk fags
[07:36:52 ] Drackarn > Oooo nice one for the "rage" forum thread
[07:36:56 ] Dr Wilson > What the heck did I walk into !?
[07:37:09 ] P > a bunch of bitchs
[07:37:19 ] Chuck Sanussi > Kill: P (Republic Fleet Firetail) dude
[07:37:23 ] Drackarn > Tears, lovely sweet tears

Of course the QCats invented the Cockbag Thrasher. The insta-lock/high-alpha one-man gate camp. Not everyone appreciates it tho...

[01:19:16] E > i really
[01:19:18] E > really hate gate camps
[01:19:30] Shadow Adanza > Just a one-man camp here.
[01:19:42] E > like legit, i don't care if i die 100 times in actual combat, but gate camping is for nigers and faggots
[01:20:05] Shadow Adanza > Have a good evening. ^_^
[01:20:12] E > bags of dicks
[01:20:14] E > choke on them

He mad, bro....

19:11:45] Rabugento > gf my friend
[19:11:50] C > Rabugento fuck u bonus fag
[19:11:59] C > Rabugento stupid noob
[19:12:09] Rabugento > you hurt my feelings
[19:12:20] C > i piss to u dface
[19:12:26] Tzenick > I think he lokes you rab
[19:12:33] C > u noob)
[19:12:36] Tzenick > likes
[19:12:37] C > Tzenick u noob
[19:12:43] C > samurais faggots
[19:12:49] Rabugento > ;3

Apparently we cheat in FW too! If we find a war target trying to capture a plex we are supposed to sit and wait whilst he deals with the NPC rat.....

b > so cheeszy
b > so cheesy
Takahara Omari > gf
b > no
b > you cheated
Takahara Omari > hows that?
b > you engaged while I was dealing with a cruiser mob
Takahara Omari > thats an NPC right?

Apparently drones are a bad weapons system...

[13:11:31] Tzenick > gf
[13:11:50] M > not really
[13:11:52] M > drones are fucking weak
[13:12:12] Tzenick > They are fine just get used to them
[13:12:32] M > fuck you
[13:12:41] M > w8 there ill be back
[13:12:44] M > im my fucking
[13:12:47] M > loki
[13:12:53] Tzenick > Dude calm down
[13:13:07] Tzenick > What crawled up his shorts

So there you go. A selection of rage and tears directed at me and my fellow QCats from the year that was 2013. I would point out we rarely kill carebears. If you are mining or ratting in low-sec, well, you know the risk. The vast majority (if not all) of the above are "PvP'rs". It just makes the mind boggle doesn't it....


  1. Precious!

    Makes me wish I saved the funniest tears I've had bawled at me. Good one!

  2. Cloaked, stabbed, trash-fit frigates in Faction Warfare are certainly ridiculous; but I blame bad design choices by CCP, not the farmers themselves.

    The game is designed so that it is highly profitable to join FW with no intention of actually fighting ... and so, surprise, surprise, people have done exactly that. If you want fewer combat-averse pilots clogging up FW space, the answer is to convince CCP to stop encouraging them to join it.

    As for the post-fight chats, I personally make a point of not saying 'good fight' after most of my own engagements in low/null. I'm all for sportsmanship, and I generally will say something congratulatory, but it's far more likely to be something like 'nice kill' than the traditional 'gf'.

    Because, frankly, it wasn't. When I'm in dangerous space my fits, my route choices and my entire strategy are based around NOT getting into fights*. There's a decent chance I'm flying a completely unarmed ship; if not I'm probably 'only' horribly outgunned. I have no objection to people trying to kill me - it's part of the game, and I've had a lot of fun with the cat-and-mouse hunt at times - but from my perspective the fight itself isn't so much part of the game as the signal that this time I lost.

    *And no, I'm not a FW farmer. ;)

  3. I'm a newbie and when i started FW some people told me to use wcs because there is no other way to make money as a newbie in FW... Tried it, found it horrendous and meaningless (hey, i've signed up for war!) and then switched to "pvp" fits... lost 30+ ships (while i have around 10-12 kills) but I'm having fun. The only problem is that my wallet is getting thinner :).